The keyboard on my laptop no longer functions adequately. That means that when I type a "e" the computer instead types a "p". A "d" tends to paste the current date. "C" and "3" are similarly disobedient but I have yet to decipher their affect other than making me scream, pull out my hair, and frantically hit ctrl+z.
What brought about this curse? I do not know. However, other Lenovo owners report the exact same problem lending me to question if perhaps the Gods prefer ASUS or Macs and are punishing the infidels who ventured away from the pack. I think this must certainly be the case and I have begun to feel true regret and suffering. My suffering is solely the result of my own arrogance that a powerful laptop with a solid build quality could be acquired for less than $500. I recognize now the error of my ways.
However, true atonement and redemption do not come easily. Thus, I currently slog through the purgatory of Lenovo support lines assisted only by a Skype subscription and supply of instant coffee. First I am transferred to a dial tone by a supportive operator. Next I woefully admit I lack a U.S. number and currently live in mainland China, again, a friendly operator turns me away to ask for support in the "correct region". Unfortunately, time zones mean that what is the correct time in the U.S. is the completely wrong time in China for customer support. I must establish camp and resume again tomorrow.
I already expect the response I dread most. As I try and sleep, ghostly premonitions whisper in my ear. "Send your laptop in for servicing. Perhaps two or three weeks and we will have it back to you." The freezing wind does not chase away these thoughts. Instead the pain of lacking a computer for weeks or maybe months dominates my mind. No Skype, no blogging, no communication. Only silence.
In the morning I will face the continued drudgery of support lines. Will there be English speakers for my "region". I have doubts. The best I can do is sleep and continue to pray for forgiveness from the mighty computer gods.
My external keyboard offers me no peace.
My hardware sin defines me.
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